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.Thursday, June 01, 2006 ' 9:53 PM Y
Today's post just a boring little update. 'Cause I've got nothing better to do at the moment. Well anyways... I got my report book back today, with some nice comments from my teacher. I'm not satisfied with my results though. For my own privacy I won't disclose how bad they are, but just a hint. That kind of results are not going to get me anywhere I want to go. Holiday lessons officially started today. I was late for the first class. So not a good start. I overslept and had to get a cab to school. What a waste of money. Oh did I mention that the first lesson was Social Studies? B-O-R-I-N-G... But at least I did pay attention. No, don't laugh. I really did pay attention. Mainly because there wasn't anyone to talk to anyways. Next up was Accounts. New chapter. Well umm... I think I understand most of the lesson. But towards the end I was so tired I simply fell asleep. Sheesh... I couldn't help it... On top of my tiredness there was this really comfortable air-conditioned room... Who could resist? Then I had oral practise for Chinese. Went pretty well. The teacher said I could read fluently, just that my speed of reading was too fast. Keke. And my oral conversation was much better than the last time. But I still felt nervous. Even though it was just a practice. I had a hard time forcing myself to look at the teacher instead of staring out the window. Just hope that I'll be able to do as well for my O Levels' oral exam. Its in about... three weeks' time I think. Scary...

Well then. As usual I went blog hopping. Who else's but QR and SQ? Nothing much to say to them both, except that as long as they think what they're doing right now will truly make them happy then go ahead. But if whatever you're doing only causes you more pain, then maybe its time to start reconsidering your decisions, and to think to other ways to accept things that you don't want to face. That's called reality, although it can be cruel... Oh and... To SQ... I really don't want to argue. No offense. But I don't see the point. You're stubborn. I am too. We've both got our temper and our beliefs that we are not wrong. If you really think that I've been neglecting you, then maybe I really have. After all if I haven't, you wouldn't have developed this sort of thinking, right? But I'm just hoping that you'll give me another chance to make amends. Please stop rejecting every single person from this "group". Not everyone is as cold as you think. And don't argue that you'll still be contacting ZX. Come on. How often do you guys really talk? Oh nevermind. I guess I don't really have the right to say this.

Sometimes I really wonder at how easy it is for some people to want to estrange themselves from a group of people so easily. I'm not specifically referring to anyone here, just being general. I mean... after so many years of friendship, can one really give it all up just like that? I know I'll never be able to do that. But I do agree that it would be great to be able to "start living" all over again. It basically means that you're walking on a whole new path towards a future totally different from the one you used to envision. I've been wondering for a very long time. Wondering how it would be like to be able to lose my memory. Its almost like rebirth. You start finding yourself again, start learning things. Although there'll be a little bit of helplessness but it also means that you get to start your life all over again. I think I would really like that alot. Maybe some of you would argue that, hey, wouldn't you be curious and want to start finding your memory again? Well I guess so... But then that process takes time, and by the time you've found all your past memories, you probably won't get affected much. Yea true. As you lose the sadder memories, you lose the happier ones as well. But then it'll be up to you to create more happier memories, right?

Okay whatever. I'm just spewing crap. All this nonsense about memories. I'm seriously getting demented. And oh don't I love my title for today's blog. Hahas. Its just as crappy as the content. Well-matched!

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