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.Sunday, December 24, 2006 ' 3:17 AM Y
I seriously dunno wads your problem la ok? If u really think u're not wallowing in self pity here, den perhaps u might like to explain wad the hell u're exactly doing la... Wads with the "i'm so lonely" or "i'm always extra; everyone forgets about me" talk? If u're lonely den do something about it... stop thinking dat people ask u out cuz they pity u. Cuz no one does. We just ask cuz we want to. And when we don't ask, we have our reasons too. Don't take it for granted that everyone will always ask u out all the time. It just doesn't work this way. Not only for u. For everyone else. Its normal for people to forget. And if u're just gonna sit back and tell urself that u dun wanna be extra instead of doing something about it, den too bad if u remain forgotten. PAP doesn't garner their votes by shaking their legs at home and keeping mum... Oh.. Another thing. Stop acting depressed over every single small thing la... Its childish, immature and simply stupid la... Just cuz we don't ask u out? Just cuz another girl dumped u? Just cuz u can't find a steady girlfriend? Please la.. Life is more than dat la... If we don't ask u out... plan your own acitivities la... If the girl dumped u then tell urself u're worth better dan dat la... Cry once, cry twice, den shut up lor... And wads all the crap about NOT wanting to find another girlfriend so soon? No offense but u sound kinda desperate to me la... And yes u are SO right. I've changed. Everyone has. What's the big deal? Life is all about changes wad... Y didn't u look into the mirror the year after u entered ITE and say "WHAT THE FUCK? Y I CHANGE UNTIL LYDAT?!!!" If we could cope with ur "new personality", y can't U cope with ours? Yea i've gotten myself a boyfriend so wad? And yes I dare to admit that he is definitely more important than u. Come on la... If I don't put him at top priority den y do i bother calling him my boyfriend? So stop saying things like... "u got bf le dun wan gor le lor..." If dats the case I should have disowned qr as my jie long ago le ba... =.="

I dont care if u're thinking dat i'm commiting some heinous crime for even posting this... I've had enough la... Stop blaming others for your unhappiness. For heaven's sake... No one told u to sit dere and sulk like a little boy. If u wan to do dat den its ur problem. Don't say dat mr-so-and-so said this and that to make u unhappy. U're the one who allow urself to be unhappy. I used to feel guilty whenever u did dat la... Like i really did something wrong. But as u say lor... I CHANGE LE. And I can safely say dat i dun think i've done anything wrong la... I dun care wad u're going to say after reading this entry. I know it wun be anything nice but so be it. And lastly... I suppose its not gonna be able to penetrate ur thick head but i still must advice u. To grow up. And wake up. See that the world doesn't spin for u. Even if u're depressed, even if u're sad, the sun still rises and sets. And God still doesn't give a damn shit. So please just buck up and do something constructive in ur life instead of moping around. Lets just hope dat maybe one day, all this will finally get into dat thick head of urs.

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.Tuesday, December 19, 2006 ' 11:57 PM Y

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.Thursday, December 14, 2006 ' 12:55 AM Y
Just came back from some orientation kind of thing... I've been duped man... Okay... The story is that I went for a job interview yesterday and they told me that I got the job. So today I was supposed to go for some orientation thing where they were supposed to show us (me and a couple of other girls) what our job is about. To cut it short, I found out that what we were required to do was to go aroud to coffee-shops and try to get the customers to buy stuff from us... I was like "Oh my god! You seriously don't expect me to do that kind of thing, do you?" I mean... If I were a customer at a coffee-shop, I wouldn't appreciate people asking me to buy this and that while I'm trying to enjoy my meal. I followed my "buddy" around until 3 plus when I really couldn't take it anymore and went back to the office to return them my training pass. So now I'm still officially jobless. IKEA did ask me to go back on Saturday to help them give out all the free stuff again though... Yay!!! Haha... I'm happy to be able to go back. Plus,the pay is good. The only sad thing is that Wan Yang and Jing Yan won't be there. I wonder who else they asked...

I'm watching the Asian Games on Channel 5 now... Sailing. Singapore vs India (2-1 so far) So boring... Watching them sail the boats... Haha... I hope Singapore continues to win though. That would mean another gold medal for us! ^.^! Feeling very bored now actually... Got nothing to do... Haix... I think I go MSN look for people to talk to bahx... Oh yea... One last thing. Please tag to tell me if you think my font is too small.

loved





.Monday, December 11, 2006 ' 2:57 PM Y
I'm finally back again!!! Teehee... I guess I haven't been much into blogging for the past few months... Because its funny that whenever I start to type, the things that I wanted to blog about suddenly disappear... More like, I can't remember. Haha... So instead, I've been writing inside my own diary, which is now more than three-quarters filled. Okay... I admit most of the content is actually quite depressing and sad and whatever negative words you can think of, but the dates between each consecutive entry is now of a wider span. Does what I just said make any sense? Well, basically it means that I'm becoming less depressed, less sad, less negative. It doesn't mean that I've totally transformed into a bright and cheery sunflower, but at least I'm improving. And for the first time in my whole entire life, I'm sure of what I want for myself. I know how I'm going to shape my personality and character to someone I recognise and like. Maybe some of you will just think that I'm turning into a bitch. And maybe sometimes I do end up being a bitch to you. But thats because I'm sick of being the soft-hearted, compliant old me. Yup. Thats what I come up with when I think of myself in the past. I just hope you guys can accept me for who I'm going to become. If we're truly friends, I know you will.

Now... Time for some tiny updates about my life. I suppose you guys would know that I'm officially with Gray now. ^.^! What I'm going to say next is probably going to cast me in bad light, but I'm still going to say it: I no longer blame myself for what happened between him and Van. Thats all. I'm not going to elaborate on details since thats all in the past.

I guess time really flies in some sense. Its already three weeks since I finished my 'O' Levels and I'm still job-hunting. Some of the people I called are really rude. They just abruptly tell you that you're "too young" and slam the phone on you without further comment. That 4-day stint working for IKEA was really fun. Although I don't know why they posted me to Alexandra instead of Tampines, I'm still happy. It was a really great experience. Well... my main job was just to blow up the balloons and give them away to the kids, but I ended up helping with the freebie distributors as well, since we were pretty short-handed. The balloons part was fun. Those kids are just so cute that you forget all your tiredness when they smile at you and say "Thank you". And some adults are just as happy to accept balloons from you too. BUT. Its a totally different case for the Famnig, which is actually a small heart with two hands that you can put around your wrist or do whatever you like with it (the hands can be joined together with Velcro). Okay. That was just a brief explanation in case some of you don't know what I was talking about. Anyway, back onto the topic of giving away Famnigs. You'd be surprised at how kiasu Singaporeans can be. One customer is actually entitled to one Famnig, but you get

1) people who ask for three or four or five
2) people who ask "is it free?" And when you tell them, yes it's free, they ask for extras
3) people who can't wait and just stretch their hands into the bag containing the Famnigs

I totally agree with one of the other part-timers. You see, there was this auntie who asked for five of those cute little hearts as she had five grandsons and she didn't want them to fight over only one Famnig. Dennis actually told her that she might as well not take a single one. Then her grandchildren won't fight over something that they don't know about. LOL. Luckily he told the auntie he was just kidding. If not, the auntie might have complained against him. Haha. And there was Yan Cheng. Totally hardworking man... You tell him to do something and he really does it without complaining. Haha. Some of the part-timers who came on the second day were terrible though. They're actually university students who are on holiday, but they act like secondary students. These are girls who have to stick together even when they're working, and totally do not understand the meaning of taking initiative to help others who are busy with other stuff. Noooo... They can just stand there and chit-chat away when they're supposed to be giving out some other freebies. And when you give them a fifteen minute break, they disappear for half an hour. For goondu's sake. These people are suppposed to be twenty years old. Is it wrong to expect a higher maturity level, more self-discipline and initiative in them?

Oh yeah. The OSIM guy. Micky or Nicky. Haha. Forgot his name. But he was quite friendly with me and Wan Yang. Nice chatting with him. And a great thank-you to him for helping us refill the bags with Famnigs on the last day when we were too busy to do it ourselves. =)

Haha. I guess I better stop ranting on about those four days of working at IKEA. But I'd definitely go back and work for them if I ever get the chance. The job duties may be vastly different, but the people there are really friendly and nice. They make you feel as though you've been working there for years instead of days. In any case though, its over. Now I'm just waiting for my pay. And looking out for another job. Haha. Anyone who got lobang just intro me okies? ^.^!

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