.Tuesday, August 26, 2008 ' 1:43 AM Y
"This is a post from my man Interceptor, directed to a guy who didn't feel much hope. The thread has been deleted, for reasons which don't need to be elaborated on.
Fortunately I copied and saved this post before the thread was deleted.
If it's really BAD for you right now--- like REALLY BAD and you don't see any light at the end of the tunnel--- if your thoughts are getting the best of you--- if you feel like you're going through one of those "turning point" moments but don't know exactly what to make of it, if you feel everyone in your life has let you down and the human race is something you can't handle, this slightly edited post is for you.
...You are killing your psyche.
You are choosing to regress and wallow in Self Pity.
....I am going to tell you something that will stand out in your mind for the rest of your Life.
This MUST be the BASIS for your Perspective on LIFE, until Consciousness in the Earth is RAISED.
You CANNOT EXPECT things from people.
Even your parents.
Get used to the idea that we all grw up thinking that the love and attention we got from our parents is how the World WORKS. That EVERYONE we Love WILL in fact , give back this LOVE in the SAME Manner. UNCONDITIONALLY and ENDLESS.
This is not happening for the time being. The sooner you realize that, the better off you will be.
You cannot EXPECT Help and Support and Loyalty and Reciprocation from People.
You must learn to understand that what People GIVE you is BY THEIR Choice, NOT YOURS.
Anything you want from people, and are trying to "GET" will only SLIP AWAY FASTER.
When you try to USE People to FILL UP A VOID in your SELF.......... You are two steps behind and falling further behind.
You cannot EXPECT People to Fill YOU Up.
That can ONLY COME FROM INSIDE you.
You and ONLY YOU can TRULY "LOVE" YOURSELF UNCONDITIONALLY.
And yes, YOU have the POWER to do that. Loving youself is a choice.
You are clearly not making that choice.this is the cold hard bitter truth........
........the more you try to GET and TAKE from people, and the MORE you 'expect' from PEOPLE, the LESS they WILL GIVE to YOU.
You MUST be SELF Sufficient.
You must be SELF RELIANT.
You must be SELF ASSURED.
You must HAVE SELF ESTEEM!
You must RECOGNIZE your SELF WORTH! Even in the face of bullsh*t "EViDENCE"!!!
Because that "EVIDENCE" means you are LOOKING to the OUTSIDE to VALIDATE you! You are seeking APPROVAL of YOUSELF!
From everyone EXCEPT the MOST IMPORTANT Person....YOU.
The more you are NEEDY, the LESS people will give.
The more you NEED support, the less they will support you.
THE MORE you try TO TAKE...the LESS YOU WILL GET!
THE ONLY HELP THAT YOU WILL GET..IS ONLY ONLY ONLY ONLY WHEN YOU HELP YOURSELF FIRST!!!!!!!!!!
ONLY ONLY ONLY.
YOU MUST HELP YOURSELF FIRST!
IF not, no one will step up and do what you can do.
THERE IS NO BETTER HELP THAN SELF HELP.
OTHERWISE, you will NOT build SElf Esteem from your own self help!
You will learn to be NEEDY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
DO YOU UNDERSTAND?????????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !
You must recognize that whatever Love and Affection you get is a GIFT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
That is one of the MOST IMPORTANT Premises and Perspectives YOU MUST have as a Mature Masculine Realized Man.
You cannot go out looking for reciprocity and expecting Behavior from people. No no no.
The only reason you feel that this is wrong, and you feel the world has wronged you ,and that you are OWED something by people is because you have NOT YET RECOGNIZED your SELF WORTH!!!!!!!!!!!
AND CANNOT at this TIME LOVE YOURSELF .
You LACK Self LOVE.
So in order to FILL THAT VOID.......YOU ARE EXPECTING OTHERS TO FILL IT FOR YOU!
THIS IS WRONG.
Your GOAL in Life is to be Independent.
And find Happiness the WAY YOU want it.
The most important recognition comes from yourself.
The most important beliefs and opinions are your own.
The most valuable Validation comes from yourself.
You probably will not agree to a lot of this.
Because of your current Point of View.
What is that POV?
That you EXPECT people to be good to you, because you are good to them.
This is wrong.. my friend.
You place too much importance and meaning on outside sources and people. This is wrong.
And here's something you have to consider..
your Beliefs are responsible for what you FEEL RIGHT NOW.
The reason you feel this way is BECAUSE OF the MATRIX/Belief SYSTEM YOU HAVE Subscribed to.
Im going to let you read this and let it sink in.
You are not to reply until you have read this thoroughly and have come up with concret questions.
Do not wallow in Self Pity.
Do not glamorize or canonize yourself for suffering.
Ok, Take some time right now.
Take a deep breath and get yourself together.
We will help you through this.
But I warn you, if you don't own up to your mistakes,dont take responsibility, live in denial and rationalizing, and continue the "Woe is Me." attitude, you will be losing one of the greatest opportunities you can even imagine.
There are guys who came back from Iraq right now whom have no arms or legs, and are badly scarred.
Many of them are actually Happy and resolvent and un shakeable.
They've seen buddies blown up, body parts everywhere.
They've lost good friends, and have horrible memories, and severe severe trauma and physical ailments.
Many of them want to stay active and keep helping others in any way they can.
Stand back, gain proper perspective, use Observing Ego.
Realize that this moment RIGHT NOW is one of the GREATEST moments of your Life.It is one of the crowning points of achievement in your life.
I am not lying to you.
What you are about to do, and the journey you are about to embark on will change your life and the lives of people around you forever.
The self esteem you will build STARTING NOW will remain untouched forever and no one can ever EVER take it away from you.The accomplishments you will begin to do will be outside of your imagination......
It all starts now.
Quoted from: http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=137740
Okay, before you people start thinking I've going ballocks, this forum post was shown to me by Dear and I think EVERYONE should really read this and reflect. Yes this was how I used to be, and even now I am still, even though I have become better, I am still very much imperfect.
Sure. There is no perfect being in this world, but that should not be an excuse for us to simply sit there and NOT do anything about our lives. Read the entire post and truly reflect on what you are now, what you have been and what you want to be. I shall not say more.
.Friday, August 22, 2008 ' 12:08 AM Y
I missed the National Day Rally Speech~! Bummers. Was just looking through some of the netizens' reactions regarding the speech by PM Lee and there was this person who was lamenting that "I can’t figure out which is worse… getting more locals to give birth (higher taxes and more children on the streets) or getting in immigrants. As I was discussing with my colleagues earlier, we can’t imagine which is worse." (quoted from http://theonlinecitizen.com/2008/08/the-internets-reaction-to-pms-speech/)Imo, its because of people like this that causes ageing population, and if you've been listening to your teachers, AP isn't something to cheer about because WE are the generation that gets affected. Who do you think are contributing the susidies for medical and hospital bills? In future when there are more old people than young, will the burden ever get lighter then? And anyway, taxes will only increase, never to decrease. That's been the "law" for that past 43 years of independence.Enough about politics. Anyone interested in knowing the contents of this year's National Day Rally Speech can visit http://www.channelnewsasia.com/nationalday/rally_ch.htm. Don't worry about pages of long texts, its all in point form for easy reading.
One last thing before I sign off. If you're one of those slamming Jade Seah about not being good enough to be the Today In Beijing presenter, then FUCK OFF. I'm not like her hardcore fan or anything, but I don't think she has done anything seriously bad to deserve such negative comments. So maybe she doesn't sound enthusiastic enough, but hey, give her a chance! Stop beating others up over all sorts of trvial stuff. Don't Singaporeans have anything better to do? Oh shucks. Whatever. Time to go play games!!! Haha. P.S. I've just started playing GBA games through the emulator VisualBoy. Brings back fond memories of how I used to hang out in the school library with Albert and the "gang" after school.
.Friday, August 15, 2008 ' 11:27 PM Y
Ola~! Have you all heard? Singapore has been guaranteed at least a silver medal in the Olympics~! Haha. Apparently our 1st medal was in 1960. Which was years before we actually became independent. So technically speaking, the medal wasn't truly ours, right? Whatever. This medal is going to mean so much more to the country. And of course, the table tennis trio are gonna be rich. As in literally.Anyway, work is getting on great. Even though the regular customers are fucking irritating (more about them later), I'm getting on fine with my colleagues. Well, except one or two of them. For the first time in almost a decade, I'm getting along with the people around me without too much friction. All through upper primary and secondary, there have always been these certain groups of people who made me feel ostracized and picked on me, basically making my life miserable. And I couldn't ignore them, because they were my classmates. Well, even though the people at Zone X are my colleagues and not classmates, the relationship (to me) is still pretty much the same. And therefore I'm glad that I'm not having any problems with them - so far. That, however, CANNOT be said for the regular customers (henceforth short-termed to "regulars".)The regulars are this group of people who visit the arcade everyday. I'm so NOT exaggerating. I've seen the same faces every single day since I started working almost 2 weeks ago, and each time they come, they spend at least fifty bucks each. Some of them even spend up to a hundred dollars. On a daily basis okay. There are 2 things that piss me off more than anything else. The first is that whenever they come, they love to spend their money catching those adorable plushies and soft toys and keychains and whatnots from the machines (what we call UFO Catchers). Its perfectly fine with me if you want to spend your entire fortune on those machines but stop asking us staff to keep shifting the toys all the time so that you can spend the minimal amount of money to catch the bloody thing~! For goodness sake! We are not paid to constantly adhere to your demands to straighten the plushies because YOU knocked it out of position. And quit bugging us to shift it to the way you want it because we are obviously not allowed to do so. Fucking assholes (some of them). Just a few days ago, this guy obviously got so pissed off because we refused to shift the toys that he was like "You want me to feedback and say that the staff is courteous? Dream on~! This is lousy service!" And you know what's ironic? He wasn't even the one trying to catch the toy. He was just trying to "act hero" and speak up for another regular that he happened to know. Nabeh. Can't people just learn to mind their own business? And as for the second thing, I don't know about you, but if it was me and I learnt about such a thing, I'd certainly get super pissed off. There's this auntie who's also a regular "fifty-buck-spender" at the arcade. Well, a few nights ago when it wasn't that busy we started chatting about studies and the topic got to government funding. And you know what she told me? Her son who is studying in poly is under government funding, and has been for the past few years. Why am I so pissed? Because while the "government" is paying for her son to study, she is spending hundreds of dollars a day on frivolous things and betting another hundreds of dollars on 4D. WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS WORLD COMING TO? Smart people should know that when students receive financial help, much of this amount of money actually come from students who are paying full fees. So imagine how you'd feel if you find out that you are indirectly paying for these sort of people to wile their time away at the arcade, and spending unnecessary money on 4D bets that, 99.9% of the time, won't win a single cent? Good thing I quit poly, or I'd weep.Luckily my funding for CAT is from NTUC. I know that money is almost most probably contributed by citizens as well, but hey, as least my parents contribute back in income tax. And for sure I'm not going to spend 80% of my life in front of some arcade machine. I believe in karma, in retribution, and that is exactly what these people will get. And I believe that karma is actually starting to kick in. The auntie's younger son is so freaking spoiled that he can't even carry his own schoolbag. In fact, he RUNS AWAY when I tell him to carry it. Spoiled kids like that aren't going last long in today's society. Oh well, the children will pay for the parents' sins. Oops. Going a little too deep there. Time to play Risk again~! Haha.
.Wednesday, August 13, 2008 ' 1:42 AM Y
Dear surprisingly logged onto MSN to show me a few articles he came across on some forum that really interesting. Here they are:
10 Types of Women to Avoid:
10 Types of Men to Avoid:
The 14 Types of Women (long and detailed elaborations included):
Its astonishing how many guys and girls can pop up in your mind when you read through all the articles. Did you find anything that describes you? Haha.
Some extra food for thought. Do us girls/women really know what we look for in a guy? Bitching sessions turn up qualities like sense of humor, tall, handsome, blah blah blah, and the list goes on. But how many of us actually get together with a guy who fits that ideal description?
Most Women Do Not Know What They Want in a Relationship
Ways Women Avoid Responsibility:
How Feminism Destroyed Men:http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=146630&highlight=feminist
Now, before anyone starts flaming me about why I seem to be so biased against women, I'd just like to clarify that I am NOT. I'm a female myself, so why would I want to purposely degrade my own sex? But if you've read through the above articles, I think most of you would agree that whatever was written mostly strike a chord, either because you know someone like that, or because you yourself are. And if its the latter, perhaps that calls for a bit of self-reflection.
And NO I'm not pointing fingers at anyone because I'm just about as guilty as anyone else.
Admittedly some of the remarks made by the authors are written in very "anti-female" tones, but I think anyone reading this should be smart enough to determine which are the overly exaggerated remarks and which are the ones that truly make a point.
Once again before I snuggle in under my lovely quilt, please try your best not to take offense at this post. But if you really feel the need to "get in touch" with me, feel free to email. Contents will not be kept confidential though. Bedtime~!
To be fair, if I every dig up any dirt regarding the male sex, I'll be sure to blog about it first thing before I do anything else. Okay?
.Saturday, August 09, 2008 ' 12:07 AM Y
I'm so tired. My feet hurt from standing and walking around for 7 hours straight. Didn't go down to Marina to watch the fireworks because my feet were hurting badly, and also because I was damn sleepy. Dear had to keep telling me not to fall asleep while watching the parade at his house. Yesterday's dinner went great. I actually blogged when I reached home, but somehow the entry wasn't posted. Oh well. Maybe I was too tired or something. Haven't been getting enough sleep the past few days. Or maybe I've become so used to clocking in ten hours of sleep a day that I find it hard to survive on only 6 hours now. That's really bad. Tomorrow's off day~!!! Still going down to AMK to accompany Dear though. I swear I'm going to try my very best to stay away from AMK Hub for at least 2 months after I quit Zone X. Its seriously one of the most boring shopping malls ever built. Besides the arcade and the cinema, there's absolutely nothing else to do. Even choices of food are limited. There is always a queue at Ichiban Sushi and Fish & Co during dinner time, and looking for a seat at the foodcourt is like looking for a needle in a haystack. I think the spacious concept of the mall was a little too, well, spacious. Haha. Off to play computer Risk. Super addicted to the game even after so long. Haha. My posts are getting shorter and shorter-there's really nothing much to blog about when you're working practically everyday and have no time to go out, is there? If it weren't for the money......
.Thursday, August 07, 2008 ' 11:40 PM Y
I was, and still am, in a freaking bad mood. Don't know why. Just feel very flustered and frustrated. Work today was damn busy. I was supposed to be doing cashiering lor! But guess what? The newcomers ALWAYS get bullied. So instead of sitting down comfortably counting money, I had to work my ass off helping to carry uber heavy boxes, cleaning shelves, , making Stitch and Mickey sit properly on the shelves, and on goes the list. Waited for Dear for dinner, finally did my Nebo MIP card, played abit of arcade and RUSHED down to Suntec to get Van's present. Whole day on my feet. Tiring or what? Sorry to those who got blasted by my extremely short temper, mainly Dear and Ben. Especially Ben, 'cause this kind of things between friends. abit more sensitive lah. Lol. But was really quite pissed off after the initial phone conversation... I'm too lazy to "reconstruct the situation", but everything's fine now, so I'm not going to harp on it. Tomorrow's dinner... Common sense tells me that I'm going to assert a godly load of self control to keep my temper down and my mouth shut. I will prevail. Haha. Will be glad to see everyone again, but let's just hope that they can get used to the fact that there's a certain bluntness to my attitude now. And that's it! Off to watching Fated to Love You. Nicest Taiwan idol drama ever yet. Haha.
.Tuesday, August 05, 2008 ' 2:24 AM Y
First day of work was...... Just another typical day. Haha. I started out being the cashier, which basically comprises of lots of duties, including topping up and cards and all that dumb shit. But here's something really really astonishing: I started work at 10am, and started cashiering at about 11am. By break time, which was about 1pm, my cash inventory was short of 50 cents. The supervisor took over for that half hour and when I came back, the cash inventory was suddenly short of $2. WTMF???? How can a supervisor with so much experience manage to "lose" 3 times the amount I undercharged in just half an hour? That is so damn crappy. But dig this. By the end of my shift, the cash inventory had an excess of $45. Am I God or what? I can magic money out of nowhere! Still in a state of disbelief. Like anytime Joanne (the supervisor) is going to call and scream at me for some mistake or whatever. Whatever. Haha.I get tomorrow off, but I have to work on freaking National Day~! Dear and I were thinking about going to watch the fireworks... Oh well. Shucks. The colleagues there aren't bad. They're not actually mean or something, just not very friendly to newcomers and don't really know how to communicate and such. Like for example, when they ask to do something, it comes out like an order or command. Really gets on my nerves. Oh, and did I mention that their English absolutely sucks? You see, they have this "communication book" where all the staff can just write suggestions or feedback from customers or things that they want to bring to the attention of other staff or Joanne (like scheduling issues), and I read through quite a few of them when it was less busy. I didn't know whether to be horrified or to laugh at the grammatical and vocabulary errors I found everywhere. Dear and I are already looking around for other jobs already. Haha. Its that bad. Especially to him. For me, I'm still adopting a wait-and-see attitude. Anyway I'm sleep already lah, so bedtime~ May not update again this week; depends on how tired I am or am not. Haha. I'm having this bad feeling that I won't be able to register on time for my CAT. For ONCE in my entire life I'm totally motivated to study; I want to study, I'm dying to study. And yet I'm being delayed by my own sister. I am so gonna murder her if I end up having to start next January instead. Screw the funding. I just want to get down to studying~! But oh well, who ever thinks of the insignificant one? She's already got a degree so why has she got to care? I'm so frustrated I need to scream it all out~! Bloody damnation.*LOL. I went to view my own blog and got SCARED by the sudden playing of the song. Something is hell wrong with me today. Haha.*
.Sunday, August 03, 2008 ' 1:53 AM Y
Does the manager at Zone X (AMK Hub) know how to plan a fucking schedule? Dear is working until 1.30am, doing closing up and still has to be there tomorrow by 10am for another day of work. What the freaking hell??? ~*~ 2 weeks on and my cough has just started getting better. Still using up loads of tissue though. =( I miss singing KTV so damn much. Hell, I can't even sing anywhere because all I can do is croak. But my voice is coming back, and my pay is coming in, so please please please, jio me to KTV okay??? Hahaha. I'm so desperate. Kinda missed Dear while he was at work. Its been half a year since we haven't seen each other practically everyday. Oops... that sounds a little mushy. *Goosebump attack* I'm getting jittery about my CAT. I so so SO freaking badly wanna start studying ASAP (I know, that's so dumb. Who likes studying? But I'm just suddenly so passionate about studying!) but I still gotta wait until my sister's company is ready before I can register. Many complicated details that I don't feel like explaining, but basically she has to get it all ready before we can enrol. Yeah lah, she's also taking the CAT. =.=" One reason why I'm suddenly so inspired to study is because I saw this brochure at Kaplan the other day when Dear went down to register for his course. Apparently ACCA and Oxford Brookes University (in UK) has this tied up programme, which means all ACCA students can graduate with a BSc (Honours) in Applied Accounting by OBU once they complete the ACCA Fundamentals exams. Cool or what huh? Now I'm so charged up and ready to plunge headlong into my studies. I remember just about a year ago when I was still at NP, all I wanted to do was to quit my studies and work. I didn't have the energy or the motivation to study even though I knew I wanted my Bachelor's degree. Now I have a specific target, its so much easier. Not to mention faster too.Judging from what I've read from my ex-classmates' blogs, they seem to be having a whooping great time in NP, but I still don't (and never will) regret my decision to leave. In fact, now I finally know which path leads to my future. Yay-ness! Just now while watching the Jacky Wu show (Guess Guess Guess or something), they had this segment featuring kids who are of mixed blood. Each of them were so freaking cute lah~!! Too bad Dear isn't an European/American. Lol. Mad ramblings. So sorry. I can't believed how hyped up I am at 2am in the morning. Crazy or what. I'm off to Bridge-ing at Viwawa. Remarkable luck these few days, although I totally suck at Big 2. Haha. Oh well... that's life. The good makes up for the bad. Tata~!
.Saturday, August 02, 2008 ' 2:40 AM Y
The whole saga between the two female bloggers is seriously getting blown out of proportion. No matter what though, I think Dawn Yang has to apologise to the people whom she has plagiarised from and cite her old entries or take them down. Its the least she can do to make up for copying and pasting other people's efforts. And STOMP should really fire such a person. Come on lah. They're paying Dawn to plagiarise? How does that reflect on the company?
By the way, the whole plagiarism thingy isn't just some unfounded accusation or whatsoever. She herself has admitted it. Quote from TNP 1st August: "I didn't do this intentionally... It didn't cross my mind that I was doing something wrong."
First, this is obviously an admittance regarding the whole plagiarism issue. Secondly, there must be a reason why your teachers from primary school to secondary school to poly/JC to university and anywhere else take copying very seriously.
Because passing off someone else's work as your own is deemed cheating~! Polytechnic students should know very well, because your tutors always stress on originality and to cite whatever sources you get your research material on. Surely Dawn has been to school? My god, she's even been to university! So how can she NOT know that plagiarism is wrong?
So I can steal or kill and say, "I wasn't aware that I was doing anything wrong!" and get away with it?
Sorry I'm also bitching in on the whole saga but I just can't stand people who copy so blatantly and expect to get away with it. Yeah I also copied my school homework last time (and I admit that its very wrong too), but at least I didn't do so during exams. Simply because your exams are graded and homework isn't! Her blog attracts so many hits and she gets paid to advertise and so on. All the more she should put in more effort to maintain it rather than just copying blindly. *Pissed off*
Hey. The woman who "revamped" that NDP video thingy got flamed like hell. At least she changed some of the things instead of using the original video and telling us that "Yo Singapore. This video from Japan or wherever is now offically our NDP video."
Moving on, Dear and I have got a part time job at Zone X. Yeah, the arcade. He started today and I start on Monday. I'm not going to go into details about the job since its not all that interesting. All I'm gonna say is that we're stationed at AMK Hub. Want more details? Ask me. Haha.
Oh yea. QR should have reached SG by now. Welcome back. =) Hope China was fun.
Hey, just because I admitted that we had a spat doesn't mean I can't welcome people back right? I'm not trying to act friendly lah. (Yea, I'm so defensive.)
More good news. My sister's business is finally taking off and Dear and I are both part of it. Again, no detailed information. Ask if you wanna know. Haha. But I'm sourcing for people/companies who are willing to advertise for us so do email me if you or your friend is interested, or if you know of advertising companies that don't charge too much. Advertising outlets such as blogs, personal websites, etc. are very much welcome. This time we're very determined to make it succeed. ^^
I've managed to watch both Money No Enough 2 and Mummy 3. I think the latter is better. The storyline is more engaging and more solid than the former.
First let's talk about Money 2. Its not funny enough, compared to previous Jack Neo films, but I think majority of the audience will be able to identify with the contents. ERP, kiasu-ness, money-minded, materialistic and all. How we tend to neglect the most important things until they're gone. The later part of the show is very touching and yeah lah I got very very teary-eyed. Watchable but maybe not that worth a $10 unless you have extra cash to spare.
As for Mummy 3, I don't like Jet Li. I don't know why but he just turns me off. Haha. But the plot is appealing, especially to people who like Chinese history like me, except that there are some minute details that are inaccurate. The action is nice, and its surprisingly funny. I was expecting something more sombre. The fighting is so-so but the development of the story engages you majority of the time. I'm just disappointed that they didn't get Liu Yi Fei to play the part of the witch's daughter. But then again, the girl playing the part looks remarkably like LYF. And by the way, Rick's son, Alex's, Chinese sucks pretty bad. Nice attempt but needs more lessons. Haha. Overall, quite worth a weekend ticket.
If you have only money to watch 1 out of the 2, I'd advise Mummy 3.
And that's it. I've really got to go to sleep or I'll be dozing off during tuition tomorrow. Good night.
P.S I'm working on improving my English so feel free to point out any grammatical or vocabulary errors. Again, through email. Thanks in advance. =)