.Tuesday, May 08, 2007 ' 11:20 AM Y
Yesterday Regina paid me a really touching compliment. She said that while watching the slide thingy and listening to the song on my blog at the same time, she almost cried. Because its like, very touching. Haha. Thanks for the nice comment. I think she's the only person so far who has ever said anything like that to me. I'll be organising the TA02 class chalet in conjunction with the guild chalet. Haha. Let me organise okays? I promise it'll be fun. Keke. For the guild BBQ on Friday, I do agree with QR that it was a success. But only to a small extent. Yes, there was food, there was drinks and there was people. But overall, I don't think any of us really enjoyed ourselves. I mean, as the main organisers, QR and Water should have at least tried to ensure that everyone enjoyed themselves. I know that it doesn't mean we have to stay in one group just because we came out in a group. But in a way, we're your guests. In a way, we were invited and we paid for the BBQ. So I don't think it was nice of you guys to run off and leave us sitting there, feeding the mosquitoes. I don't what the others think, but I really feel that it is the organisers' responsibility to ensure that their "guests" do not feel bored or anything. Because seriously, there was nothing to do after eating. (Speaking of eating, Dear and I ended up polishing off like 90% of the otahs. Imagine paying $14 to eat a whole shitload of otahs and a few chicken wings. =.=") Lucky I brought cards. Otherwise what were the rest of us to do? Sit and stare at each other meh? I'm not trying to be a bitch lah. Some of you guys are probably going to say that its past so I shouldn't bring it up anymore. But then what if next time the same things happen? Must learn from mistakes mah... =P I'm just trying to say that if you wanna organise something, then make sure that you take responsibilty for your guests and any cock-ups that happen. If you say you're busy with school, then might as well ask others to organise right? Look at it this way lah. If next time your boss ask you to organise event for the company and you have other work to clear up, are you going to tell your boss that you're not free? Its the same theory lah. I'm sorry. I know by posting this I'm going to offend quite a lot of people. Namely QR. Then BC, SK, and ZH will run over and say "Yah lah. Fuck that Debbie for saying this kind of things. She think she very good meh?!" Haha. But like Elvis say, "You got balls hor?" Lols. I have 2. On my chest. Hehs. So yes. I dare to say and I will say what I want to on my blog. I can only apologise if what I say is not taste for another person. In theory we are friends. In feeling, how much of our friendship is left? And it because of this that I'm starting to voice my doubts and opinions loud and clear. I'm not declaring war. I'm just being straightforward and saying what I think. Its my freedom. To quote Spiderman 3, "everyone always has a choice to choose what he wants". Don't always blame me for starting trouble because I never forced anyone to come and read what I post. Ok ok. Don't say liao. Or else people gonna scold me again. This past few days, I've started having doubts about myself again. Its as though the old depressed me is trying to resurface. Its making me confused. Maybe its the stress of working and studying. My social life is suffering. But the worst thing is, I'm still penniless. No matter how much I work, its never enough to cover my expenses. I only earn like $300 a month. Minus away concession and laptop, I only have $130 left. Its pathetic lah. Hais... All of a sudden, there is the feeling to want to crawl into some dark place and hide myself away. Something like shutting down. The conflict within me is that I don't want to shut down. So I keep searching for things to do that will cheer me up. My friends are helping alot. I know Regina is quite concerned. But I really don't know how to tell them what I'm feeling. Because right from the first day they knew me, I've been quite hyper and cheerful. They've never seen the old me. So I don't think they'll understand. I'm sorry guys. You're great. Its just my own problems. I'm not trying to act emo lah (si Elvis). Its really how I'm feeling now. I'm trying to stop myself lah. Haha. I like the new me. The more cheerful and outgoing one. I want to maintain it that way. My scars serve as a reminder to me. History CANNOT repeat itself. Okay lah. Save the drama. I've been blogging throughout the whole INFA tutorial. Haha. The teacher must hate me alot. Or maybe she think I'm very pro. Heh heh. I think I'm going to put up my tagboard again. I know I didn't garner my 10 votes. But at the insistence of Regina and Shawn, I'll put it up for a few weeks and see how the "response" is like. Haha. But I have to work on the colour scheme first. I must pia my INFA liao. Elvis say that if I can AD for my exam he treat me to a meal. Haha. His wallet die liao. Keke. Not I haolian hor. Now INFA is only double entry and ledger accounts. Last time Sec 3 I never study POA also can get A1. Now I pia. He cham. MuaHAHA. Hees. I'll be stopping here today. Later ask Regina send me the formal wear pictures then I post them up. =)!I'm happy to announce that my blog counter is finally close to hitting 350. FINALLY. Haha. But I'm happy can? Heesh.
