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.Wednesday, May 04, 2011 ' 12:55 AM Y
Its been a while since I last blogged, and suddenly there so many things I wanna write about that I think I'm gonna split it into 2 posts. This is due to content touching on 2 totally unrelated issues, and because its gonna be L-O-N-G.

Beware of crazily long rant!

Specially dedicated to my former employer(s):

First of all, I wanna announce with IMMENSE relief that I've finally left my former company. Not because I was unhappy with the workload, not because I couldn't get along with the people, but firstly because I felt that the job scope was "stunting my growth" in the sense that I could literally feel myself getting lazier and more sluggish as the days passed.

And secondly, also because new company policies developed to protect "company interests" were trying to rob me of my own personal interests. I mean, come on, which retard would wanna sign a memo that allows his/her employer to take back their AWS or bonus, albeit the amounts not being very huge? Just like water spilled onto the floor cannot be scooped back into the pail, wages given out to employees cannot be recalled back (without reason) and no smart employee would allow you to do that.

Of course you could argue that the employer is merely looking to protect his interests, and that true "loyal" employees would sign it unhesitantly. Well, I am not a dog. I will treat you, my fellow human counterpart, my (ex)boss, my (ex)lady boss, with the respect due to you, but ONLY if you command it. I do not pledge blind loyalty, nor would I compromise my own interests for you to satisfy yours. You may call me selfish, but which human is not? When you think up such ridiculous policies, are you not being selfish in wanting to "protect" your own company? Then I think it is absolutely fair that I disagree with your policies and choose instead, to deviate from this path, that is getting smaller and darker, to seek a new one that is better paved and illuminated. While it is true that I did not give an honest reason when I tendered my resignation, it was to save you the agony of feeling betrayed. Because I knew you'd think that way. But of course, you had to poke around in everybody's business and stab yourself wherever you feel "hurt". The agreed upon "peaceful farewell" was a huge farce and we both know it.

I do not want to touch on all the falsies witnessed over the past 2 years. You can carry on thinking that you are the smartest person in the world, with no one being able to sneak anything past you, despite all the illegal stuff you're doing, but I'd like to throw back to you your own words: "Karma will come back to haunt you".

I'm sure it was satisfyingly smug to poke around at someone else's emails and Facebook accounts to gain access to information that you weren't supposed to know. Maybe you were aware, maybe you weren't, that doing so is an invasion of someone else's privacy and that, is a crime. Maybe you thought we were dumb or brainless, but we jolly well knew that the kind of accounts we were doing weren't the norm. For starters, even someone with zero accounting experience knows that the fish, meat, vegetables and other shit you buy for your own consumption in your own house isn't claimable from the company.

I'm sure it was secretly, satisfyingly smug when you secretly called up the companies where I had been to for interviews to tattle bullshit to their HR, using information secretly gleaned from my personal email. FYI, even though you have the servers installed to spy on your employees, it is still illegal to steal data and info from their personal accounts for your own use.

I'm sure it must have been a huge throwback when you didn't get the kind of anxious reaction you'd hoped to see, because you see, I didn't really care. Not even when you found out where and when I'd be commencing work at my new job. Not even when I found out that you had been impersonating me to call my new company for information to satisfy your own psychotic hunger for prying into anyone and everyone's business.

Anger is one thing, anxiety is another. I'd have been a saint not to feel anger, but I was also honestly and sorely disappointed that the person whom I kept telling myself was "not bad, despite her bad temper" turned out to be nothing but a big fat muthafucking bitch.

I may have bitched about you behind your back, may have given you unpleasant monikers, but I can say with a clear conscience that I have never done anything to cause any sort of serious harm to you. I mean, come on, I'm sure you've done your own fair share of bitching about me too. But to stoop so low, that is a true unveiling. Well, I've been well and truly slapped in the face, but you can be sure I wouldn't be stupid enough to allow that a second time.

Well, my ex-lady boss. It is farewell, adieu, but I need more time to ponder and carefully consider if I ought to take a stand for myself. And I will surely do that.

As for my ex-boss, I am truly speechless.

For a man so highly respected in the industry, for someone who can be a leader to this employees (albeit the pathetically low numbers), for someone who has come so far and gained so much, to be so gutless, to have such a lack of balls, to allow your wife to control you like a puppet and play around with the company you worked so hard to build up over the past 20 years. I seriously cannot make up my mind whether to pity you or to laugh at you.

And I hope, for your blissful ignorance, that you never find out that the loyal dog you treasure so highly isn't who you think he is. That you never find out that he's been sneaking treats behind your back when he thinks you ain't looking.

Once upon a time you were the boss I looked up to for your intelligence, for your fatherly mien, for what I thought was impartial judgement on your part. But you so thoroughly managed to disabuse me of such notions that I suppose I should be thankful to you for opening my eyes wide. I sincerely wish you happiness, and hope that your company can continue to prosper, even at the hands of a wife who is slowly but surely squandering all your assets. I'm sure hundreds of Tupperware containers left to rot in forgotten corners are hugely essential to any human being's survival.

I have dedicated 2 years of my life to this job, and I think I can say that I've done fairly well, if not excellently, in carrying out my duties well, in ensuring day-to-day operations can be carried out smoothly, in not causing you unnecessary headaches.

I am, if nothing else, by nature a sentimental person. I keep and will treasure the memories garnered from this 2 year experience, even though it could not have been a fairytale ending.

I will never forget that I entered the company with zero experience in office work.
I will never forget the guidance bestowed upon me by my ex-colleagues and by both of you.
I will never forget that you did indeed treat me well, although at this point I can't tell if it was an act.
I will never forget that it was here that I was given the opportunity to learn, to grow, to become better and to gain an extra foothold in my future journey.

For all that I am truly, sincerely and immensely grateful, I also cannot forget the kind of beasts you both turned out to be.

It is just like the upcoming General Elections. Although the PAP has given us a lot of good years, although MM Lee has done a more than brilliant job in leading Singapore to be what she is today, we cannot discount the fact that policies over the past few years have led to increased unhappiness in many people.

Which will bring me to my next post. Please stay tuned for that.

I apologise for the long, and if somewhat boring and perhaps even confusing rant. But I really think, for an employer (hell she shouldn't even considered one since she's not under payroll of the company) to stoop so low just to dig out every aspect of his/her employees personal life, it really speaks a lot about what kind of person you are.

I shall retire to bed now and immerse myself in my current read, so as to dispel the resurfaced anger.

Side note:

People always ask me why I love to read so much, especially romance novels. I give you my answer now: Because to me, fictional romance is like giving a lollipop to a wailing kid. It helps me to calm and soothe me; to enter a world where black is black and white is white, and the gray edges will eventually be erased out; where there is true justice in that the good get the fairytale endings and the evil get their just desserts. For people like me with an overwhelmingly strong sense of justice, such tales serve as a balm to the indignation of not being able to do anything about the huge cloud of gray edges that hangs over us in real life.

It is a dream of mine to one day be able to sit still long enough to pen my own book, but that is something faraway. For a start, I'm gonna have to curb my very very bad habit of procrastinating. This blog post was supposed to have been written and posted 5 days ago but somehow or other, I kept putting it off. *Sheepish grin*

Goodnight world. May you find true, unleashed happiness in Dreamland.



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